How to make a fair group decision
Most group decisions aren't hard because people disagree. They're hard because nobody agreed on how to decide. Pick the method first, set up the options well, and the answer usually takes care of itself.
Agree on how you'll decide, before you decide
The quickest way to an argument is to start voting and then debate whether the vote counts. Settle three things up front: how people will vote, when voting closes, and that the group will go with the result.
Hard limits belong here too. If someone is vegetarian, can't do Saturdays or has a budget, take the options that fail that test off the list before the vote. A vote is for preferences, not for overruling someone's allergy.
Pick a voting method that fits
A show of hands is fine for two options. With three or more, the method you choose can change the winner. These four cover nearly every group decision:
Ranked choice
Everyone puts the options in order. The option with the fewest first choices drops out and its votes move to each person's next pick, until one option has a majority.
- Best for
- One winner from a short list: a restaurant, a name, a holiday destination.
- Watch out
- Ranking more than about eight options gets tiring.
Score voting
Everyone rates every option, say one to five stars. The highest average wins.
- Best for
- Comparing things on their own merits: designs, cottages, gift ideas.
- Watch out
- Some people give everything five stars. It still works, but their ratings say less.
Pick several (approval voting)
Everyone ticks every option they're fine with. The option the most people ticked wins.
- Best for
- Finding a date or a time, or anything where “can you make it?” matters more than “do you love it?”.
- Watch out
- It shows what people can live with, not what they're excited about.
Yes or no per option
Options come one at a time, and each person says yes or no. The most yeses wins.
- Best for
- Thinning out a long list fast, on a phone.
- Watch out
- Like approval voting, a yes is a yes: it doesn't capture how much someone wants it.
If you're unsure, use ranked choice for picking one thing and approval voting for picking a time. The explanation of ranked-choice voting walks through a count round by round.
Set up the options well
- Keep it to three to seven options. Two is a coin toss; fifteen means nobody reads past the top five.
- Let everyone add options before voting starts. People accept a result more easily when their idea was on the list.
- Give people what they need to compare. The address, the price, a link, the time. Nobody should have to open five tabs to vote.
- Don't stack the deck. Three variations of your favourite and one of everyone else's isn't a fair list, and with a simple vote it can still backfire.
Vote privately, with a deadline
When people vote in the open, the first few answers anchor everyone else. Someone says “pizza!” in the chat, and three people who'd have picked Thai quietly go along. Private ballots give a more honest answer.
A deadline matters just as much. Without one, the decision waits for the slowest person, and the group chat fills with “did everyone vote?”. For a dinner, a few hours is plenty; for a trip, give it a few days.
Then go with the result
The point of agreeing on a method is that the result settles it. If a vote ends in a near tie, that's useful too: either option is fine with the group, so pick one and go. Reopening the vote because one person lost teaches everyone that votes don't count.
A quick checklist
- Remove options that break someone's hard limits.
- Pick the method: ranked for one winner, approval for dates and times.
- Three to seven options, with the details people need.
- Private votes and a clear closing time.
- Announce the winner, and go.
Pickly does all of this with one link: ranked, score, yes-or-no and pick-several polls, places with distances, a closing time, and no way to see who voted for what. It's free and nobody needs an account. For the most common decisions, start from a restaurant poll or a date poll.